What Are the Three Types of Stalkers?
What do stalkers want from their victims? What are the three types of Stalkers?
What Are the Three Types of Stalkers?
Stalking is defined in UK law as ‘A person is guilty of Stalking if they pursue a course of conduct which amounts to Stalking.’
Sounds vague, doesn’t it? That is because it has to be.
In my background in crime and investigation, I have dealt with many stalking cases, ranging from the more benign – a work colleague sending someone he finds attractive anonymous messages on Facebook, to the more insidious – an ex-boyfriend driving over a hundred miles to assault and terrify his ex-girlfriend at work due to her finally blocking him.
The definition of Stalking must be kept loose, as stalking behaviour can encompass so many different things.
Below, are the three most common types of stalkers, along with their motivations. Aswell as one rarer, more insidious type at the end.
Types of Stalkers:
Stalkers can be classified into three main types based on their motivations and behaviour: simple obsessional, love obsessional, and erotomaniac stalkers.
Simple Obsessional (rejected) Stalker:
Simple obsessional stalkers are individuals who have a prior relationship with the victim, such as an ex-partner, former friend, coworker, or acquaintance. Their stalking behaviour typically arises after a significant rupture in the relationship, such as a breakup or rejection. The primary motivation behind simple obsessional stalking is often a desire to regain control or power over the victim, or to retaliate for perceived grievances. These stalkers may exhibit persistent and intrusive behaviour aimed at the victim, including following, monitoring, unwanted contact, and intimidation. Risk factors for escalation include a history of violence, access to weapons, and a lack of insight or remorse for their actions.
The tipping point for this type of stalker could be the victim blocking the stalker, or getting the police involved and getting a restraining order, however this is often the only way to make a stalker stop.
Violence typically occurs in 50% of these cases and is the most likely to result in homicide.
Love Obsessional Stalker:
Love obsessional stalkers are characterised by an intense fixation or infatuation with the victim. They firmly believe that the victim reciprocates their feelings, even if there is no evidence to support this belief. Their behaviour is driven by a deep desire to establish a romantic relationship with the victim. Love obsessional stalkers may exhibit persistent pursuit, fantasising, delusional beliefs, lack of boundaries, and escalation if their advances are rebuffed. Psychologically, they often exhibit extreme attachment, low self-esteem, and a distorted perception of reality.
Stalkers in this category may have learning difficulties, or difficulties reading social queues.
Erotomaniac Stalker:
Erotomaniac stalkers are convinced that the victim is in love with them, often developing elaborate delusions about the nature of their relationship. They typically target individuals of higher social status or public figures, believing that their status validates the supposed romantic connection. Erotomaniac stalkers exhibit delusional beliefs, fantasy relationships, persistent pursuit, grandiosity, and a risk of violence if their delusions are threatened. Underlying mental health issues such as schizophrenia or delusional disorder may contribute to their fixation on the victim.
Sadistic / Predatory Stalking –
Thankfully, these are very rare. The motivation for this type of stalking is often to cause fear and distress to the victim for the pleasure of the stalker.
Why Do Victims of Stalking Reply to Their Stalkers Instead of Just Ignoring them?
This often frustrates me when I have dealt with stalking cases, in that professionals will blame the victim for replying or engaging with their stalker. The simple reason for this is that if the victim does not placate their stalker, their stalker’s behaviour may escalate. Often, if the victim just blocks their stalker, the stalker may they turn up to their house, their work, or begin harassing and threatening family members.
A victim of stalking placates the stalker to keep themselves safe, and to keep the wolf from their door.
Stalking is a serious offence and, in the UK, can carry a sentence of up to ten years in prison. Stalking can result in violence and even homicide, and all stalking should be taken seriously. Do not ignore a stalker, as they will not simply leave someone alone. Their behaviour often just escalates.
If you believe you or someone you know is being stalked, then you must contact the police for support, or contact the National Stalking Helpline.
Trigger Warnings Ruin Books, And This Is Why.
Trigger Warnings Don’t Work and They Ruin Books, And Here Is Why…
Jay Darkmoore
I’m browsing through the bookshelf. See a book I like the look of, flick through the first couple of pages and I am confronted with a page that says ‘Warning, this may contain content that is upsetting for some readers,’ followed by a long shopping list of things that may traumatise me.
I immediately put that book down, and I don’t touch it again. I don’t being pandered to. I wouldn’t say I like that the writer thinks that I am so unable to handle my own emotions that they must warn me before I take a step into their world.
Dear writer – Do not pander to me. I am not a fucking child. I can handle my own emotions.
But there are more reasons why trigger warnings ruin books than simply the writer feeling that they need to hold my hand and carefully guide me through the pages, just in case I get a little bit sad at the squiggly lines –
1 – The Word ‘Triggered’ Is NOT The Same As Being Upset.
The word triggered comes from psychology. It means to be triggered into a PTSD emotional flashback, to the point where something – an event, like combat and war – happened, and you are transported back to that situation and how you felt at the time. It means that your body reacts and your hormones spike. It means that you begin to shake, to run, to fight. You lose control of yourself because the stimulus has ‘triggered’ significant trauma. It hasn’t just upset or offended you. Being offended is a choice. Remember that. You CHOOSE to be offended and you CHOOSE to be angry.
You do not choose to be triggered. Stop saying being angry is the same as being triggered. They are worlds apart, and it’s very, very disrespectful to actual sufferers of PTSD and trauma to say you got triggered because you read about a bad thing happening that made you feel sad.
2 – Your Feelings Aren’t My Responsibility
When I write a book, I write the best thing for the story and the characters. Honestly? The reader comes second. The artwork comes first. I write stories that I want to read, and through that I attract likeminded readers. Readers who will then follow me and my work and become true lasting, loyal fans.
If someone reads my work and they do not like it, then fine. I’m not the writer for them. But I couldn’t possibly pander to every possible reader’s wants and needs. It would be impossible. Not to mention that I wouldn’t be being my authentic self. The self that has made my books be downloaded and purchased thousands and thousands of times.
I tell the story that best fits the narrative and the situation for the best book possible. If I started censoring myself, thinking how would this be viewed or perceived, then that wouldn’t be the best result for the book, would it? I would be cheating the art to appeal to a small minority of people, instead of writing the book I wanted to write and giving an authentic experience. If a reader needs a trigger warning, then they probably won’t enjoy my books anyway!
If you read something in a book that is upsetting, and then get angry at the writer for not warning you that such things were going to be in the book, then that sounds like your problem. If two people read the same text, and one gets upset by it, and the other doesn’t, isn’t it the reader that is to blame? Isn’t that the problem of the reader not being able to handle their emotions, rather than the writer for writing it? It’s like getting upset over a joke a comedian makes. We focus in on what upsets us, and then we blame the person that delivered it to us. As the saying goes ‘don’t shoot the messenger.’ Your feelings are no one else’s responsibility to manage other than your own. Get your shit together.
Read the best-selling crime novel ‘Left for Dead,’ by Jay Darkmoore
3 – You’re Confusing Writing About The Bad Thing As The Bad Thing.
If I write a scene about a bad thing happening, someone might think I am condoning it or that that writing about it is exactly the same thing as the bad thing happening. This, frankly, is just fucking ridiculous.
4 – Your Trauma. Your Problem.
If you have trauma, then join the club. Everyone has trauma. Everyone suffers from mental health issues from tome to time. Everyone has something bad that has happened to them in the past. You aren’t special. Your trauma doesn’t make you unique. It makes you just like everyone else.
Therefore, your trauma and your mental health is your responsibility to manage. Not anyone else’s. If you can’t handle reading something that upsets you, then you need to sort that shit out.
5 – Life Doesn’t Come With Trigger Warnings
No body is going to warn you before they insult you, attack you or hurt you. No one is going to warn you before a car pulls out in front of you on the motorway. The weather isn’t going to warn you a week before there is an earthquake that destroys your home. So why should a damn book? Its ink on a piece of paper. It isn’t that scary...
6 – You’re Waiting For The Bad Thing to Happen, And It Ruins The Flow and Authenticity Of The Book.
If I am writing a book and I want something a little shocking or uncomfortable to read to help a scene be more impactful, it kind of loses that when I have already warned you about it.
Imagine your partner is going to propose and they set all the flowers, the lights, the music and the most amazing ring, but they showed you the ring first before doing it, just so you weren’t caught off guard (which would be exactly the point in the scenario), then it wouldn’t feel as immersive, would it? If someone warns you about something that happens in the book, it takes away the strong emotion which the writer wants you to have when reading it. It’s basically a spoiler.
Not to mention, you then spend the whole time reading just waiting for the bad thing to happen, meaning that you can’t lose yourself in the book you’re reading.
7 – You Don’t Know How Severe The Trigger Is Going to Be.
If I write a book and I tell you that it involved animal cruelty, then you might think of me gutting an animal and being cruel to it. I may just mean a character pushes a dog down a hill. Both mean things to do. One much more severe.
With a trigger warning, your mind goes to the worst-case scenario, meaning that your guard is then up.
8 – If The Genre Is Known For Upsetting Topics, And You Get Upset, Then You Were Already Warned.
I write thrillers and horror novels. My covers are dark and macabre. From the titles, the covers, and the genre alone, you should know that there is going to be some topics a little close to the bone. If you get blindsided and upset by something you read, then my friend, that’s on you.
8 – THEY DON’T WORK
Research suggests that trigger warning make anxiety to worse due to waiting for the bad thing to happen. You’re waiting to be upset, so you can’t get lost in the story.
So, in conclusion, I think we need to step away from this whole thing of books needing to be censored or the need to have sensitivity readers going over old books so they don’t offend someone. Do you want a safe space, or do you want to be transported to a new world and discover things you never knew possible? Do you want to live in a safe box filled with teddy bears and cotton wool, or do you to actually feel something when you read a book?
And remember. If you read something upsetting, you can always just skip that part, or hell, put the book down and get on with your life.
It’s been a pleasure. If you enjoyed this blog, then why not drop me an email.
jaydarkmoore@gmail.com
- J
About the author -
Jay Darkmoore is a UK-based author with a background in crime and investigation. He is a huge fan of all things dark - exploring the macabre, demonic and darker aspects of the human psyche.
Jay likes putting his characters in terrible situations and then turning out all the lights. To date, he has self-published novels of horror, crime and dark fantasy dystopia. His inspirations are Stephen King, Keith C Blackmore and Nick Cutter.
When not at his desk, Jay spends his free time making YouTube videos to help writers in their craft, promoting other books he has enjoyed, as well as hitting the gym and taking wild cold plunges with ducks.
He is a single parent to his son Joe who is his biggest fan.
Interview with Detective Laura Warburton
Interview with Detective Laura Warburton from Left for Dead by Jay Darkmoore.
Interview with Jay Darkmoore, and the infamous Detective Inspector Laura Warburton, of the Wigtown Major Investigation Team.
JD – Laura.
LW – Jay.
JD – How nice of you to join me tonight at such short notice.
LW – Thank you for having me. I’m sure the world won’t burn down in the time we’re talking.
JD – Let’s hope not. So, first question, how are you?
LW – Breathing.
JD – That’s good.
LW – Depends you look at it. Anymore?
JD – Plenty. A lot of people want to ask you questions. This one is asked by Stacy Night over on Instagram.
LW – You asked your followers for interview questions?
JD – You’re very popular.
LW – I would have done my makeup if I would have known. Or bring Bagpipe.
JD – How is he?
LW – Bagpipe? Just a cat. Does cat things. Sleeps. Eats. Shits. Sounds like a good life to me.
JD – Where did Bagpipe come from?
LW – I got him as a rescue shortly after I moved up North. I needed something to take my mind off the shit that had led to me moving up here in the first place. I was taking out the bins, and I found him in the back of a bush down the side of my house. Heard him meowing. He was so ill, the poor thing. A lot of his fur was missing. He hissed at me when I first picked him up. He was terrified. A little tuna however, he was happy to come inside. He didn’t have a chip, or a collar. I knocked on a few doors and put the word out, but no one came forward. He needed a name. Mittens or socks was too cliché. So, I thought of the most random thing I could think of, and Bagpipe came to mind.
JD – Why Bagpipe?
LW - Because no matter what you call a cat, it won’t come to you. I found it funny, and the name stuck.
JD – I love that. You’re so kind.
LW – Kind. Desperate for attention. Needing some kind of purpose. Doesn’t matter really. The result is the same, regardless of motivation.
JD - So back to the question.
LW – Of course. Sorry.
JD – Stacy Night from Instagram. She asked ‘why did you join the police force?’
LW – Fuck. You know, that’s a question I often think about myself!
JD – You’re laughing?
LW – Yeah. I think every cop starts for the same reason – because they want to help people. But we quickly find that when they step into the world of policing, that that quickly changes. You spend a lot of your time dealing with the shit the other agencies can’t be bothered with. Mental health? Call the police. Children that go missing from care? Call the police. My neighbour called me a slut on Facebook. Call the police.
JD – Does that actually happen? The Facebook thing?
LW – More than you know. It’s worrying. I got into trouble once because I had someone call us to report that someone had called them a ‘cunt’ on Facebook, and my response was, ‘are you?’ I was taken off the case at that point.
JD – It boggles the mind.
LW – It does. So, in answer to your question, I joined the job to help people, but with the abundance of terrible managers who get promoted because of how good they are at licking the arse of their superiors, rather than being a good leader, is scarily prevalent. I joined the job, do what I can, and continue to do what I can. Contrary to belief, I am a good supervisor. Much better than the others I have had working over me.
JD – Will you get into trouble for saying things like that?
LW – I couldn’t care less. The more I do this job, the more I see the flaws in the running of it. The core beliefs of the police these days is statistics and pleasing the Home Office. We have forgotten what we are here to do. Help the vulnerable. Put those who commit crimes in prison. Rinse. Repeat. Further to that… stop me if I’m rambling…
JD – No, this is great.
LW – We still do have those core beliefs. Mostly in the cops on the ground who go to the end of the world to help those in desperate need. I admire that. But the fact that bureaucracy gets in the way. It’s upsetting.
JD – This one is closer to the bone. I hope you don’t mind.
LW – Give it to me. I’m not scared.
JD – What was your original job ambition before you entered into a relationship with Ron?
LW - …
JD – Are you okay?
LW – Yeah, sorry. I just... I knew he would come up. I always wanted to lead. To be a detective. I let things get in the way. I always said, ‘don’t shit where you eat,’ and Ron was a prime example of that. He, for want of a better phrase, fucked me up beyond believe. My position in the Met was already eroding.
JD – How so?
LW – Have you spent more than twenty minutes with me?
JD – Seems your heart is in the right place.
LW – It is. But the bosses don’t like it when you tell them to fuck off, you’re busy helping someone and can’t get to the next call that has come through. Anyway. Ron helped my career, that’s true. He was influential. Popular, and vouched for me to get the inspector position. He helped me a lot in that regard. In some fucked up way, I should thank him. Because otherwise I wouldn’t have gotten the position at the MIU. However, him going overboard was one of the reasons I had to leave. Everyone believed I was somehow responsible. That I was the reason he died. I gave up trying to clear my name. Friends and colleagues all trapped under his spell. It was extremely toxic. I heard about what was happening up here, in Wigtown, and I jumped at the opportunity.
JD – And what is happening up here?
LW – No comment.
JD – One last question from Stacy.
LW – I’m going to punch her if it’s about Ron again.
JD – You’ll have to find her first.
LW – That won’t be hard.
JD – Why are you laughing?
LW – Because everyone thinks they can evade the police until we’re breaking down their door at five in the morning. Anyway. Go with the question.
JD – She asked what do you enjoy about your job? That the police see the darkest aspects of humanity and carry on like its nothing. So, what do you enjoy, and what do you hate?
LW – That’s actually a very good question. But first, I would like to clear a misconception. Firstly, the police aren’t machines. We deal with horrific shit all the time, but that doesn’t mean we are immune to it. Drunks fighting in the street. Dead bodies. Burglaries. It’s all in the day to day. We deal with that all the time. Me, anyway. What affects me though, is when we can clearly see that someone is being abused, and they won’t leave the perpetrator. It’s not all black and white, that someone can be abusive, and the other party will up and leave. It’s much more complicated than that. So, when I get repeat calls to an address of a women being abused by their partner, or a man being abused by their girlfriend or wife, then I feel like grabbing them by the shoulders and screaming at them ‘let me help you!’ But it’s so difficult. Which is why when they do finally decide to have faith in us, we have to act on it and give them the best service as possible. So, my answer to that question is the same to each of them. I love helping people, and I love when I can really make a difference in someone’s life. When I can lock that abuser away. Get the victim on courses and therapy to stop them going through it repeatedly. When I manage to really turn someone’s life around. But you must take care of yourself. Police officers can soak up so much hate, so much sadness in a single shift. The adrenaline spikes are insane, and you can be left mentally, physically, and emotionally bereft after a long shift. You must take time to care for yourself. Some go the gym. Get outdoors. Have a bath so hot your skin is peeling off. Whatever it is. Make sure you take care of yourself. You can’t help the broken if you’re broken too.
JD – And the part you hate?
LW – The part I hate is when you try everything you can, and they still end up dead.
JD – Do you need a minute?
LW – No. Keep going.
JD – Favourite type of alcohol?
LW – The wet kind that comes out of a bottle. But, if I had to choose, it would be red wine. The darker the better. I don’t like how it stains your teeth though.
JD – What would your death row meal be?
LW – I have actually put a lot of thought into this. When your job is to put terrible people in prison, it crosses your mind what would happen if you were in that position. I would have to say a nice steak, medium rare, with thick cut chips, and some steamed asparagus on the side, and a very nice helping of peppercorn sauce.
JD – My mouth is watering. We should grab some of that after this.
LW – I appreciate the offer, but like I said, I don’t shit where I eat.
JD – Noted. Favourite song?
LW – I have a varied taste in music. I like classical. Claud Debussy’s Clair De Lune, or Chopin’s Nocturne number two in Eb Major are favourites of mine. However, I really like metal: Slipknot. Mudvayne. Sleep Token. All that stuff. But my number one song, has to be Perfect by Fairground Attraction.
JD – What is a happy memory of yours?
LW – When I was a girl, around ten, I went to Finland with my mother. We went sledding down a huge snowy hill. About a third down, we came off the sled and rolled in the snow. We laughed the rest of the walk down. It was magic.
JD – Did you meet Father Christmas?
LW – I met someone who was dressed like him. But I when I figured it out, I was told that the real one was busy. Which made sense. He has a lot to do.
JD – What do you want for Christmas?
LW – A good night’s sleep!
JD – You’re laughing again.
LW – The joys of being a cop. The price we pay. We pour more than just our hearts and emotions into our work. We pour our time and energy too. We sacrifice meals, sleep, comfort, birthdays, family events, Christmas’s, New Year. You name it. Halloween is the worst. Somehow someone somewhere thought it was a good idea to arm everyone in the country with explosives and let them all wear masks and set fires, and we wonder why its utter chaos that time of year.
JD – This one is from KBMillion on TikTok.
LW – That’s just for kids dancing, isn’t it?
JD – BookTok is great. Good place to find books. KBMillion has asked ‘do you think serial killers are born, or made that way?’
LW – I don’t think anyone is inherently born evil. Yes, people can be more wicked than others, but I believe it starts in the home. Every killer I have spoken too have all said that it started when they were younger. Yes, some are quicker to falling into darkness than others, but it starts in childhood. Abuse. Poverty. Adverse Childhood Experiences. Even children that have a great life but are spoiled by their parents and get everything they want can become killers. They become entitled. So, no. I don’t believe killers are born. But then again, remove the laws of society, and our true nature comes out. Maybe killers are just living more authentic to our true selves? Maybe their just animals. Maybe their lost souls.
JD – Do you have children?
LW – No. Nor do I want them. As a woman, I have had a lot of shit for that. That I put myself and my career first. Firstly, I need a partner, and being bisexual, I can only procreate with only a select half of who I like to fuck. But my track record with men hasn’t been great. Ron wanted us to have a child. He told me once when we were having a meal. I can’t remember where it was. Italian, I think, but he told me he wanted me to come off my birth control. I said no, which is like throwing petrol on a fire to an abusive person. You’re taking the control from them. He screamed at me, threw my wine over me, and stormed out the restaurant.
JD – That sounds awful.
LW – You say that, and it was. But by that point it had become normal. I was just upset that he picked the wine. It was £15.00 a glass.
JD – You shrug off such things so easily. How?
LW – One thing about domestic abuse is that it becomes part of your every day. It isn’t always like that - violence. Sometimes, if not most of the time, it’s subtle. A comment. A lie. A little gaslighting. Eventually, you just want the argument to happen, because it gets it out the way, and then there’s the happy time after it. So no, I don’t want children, because I don’t ever want to be tied to another person for life. People can change, and it’s good to have an exit strategy. That’s much harder with a child in the middle. A child won’t fix a broken or abusive relationship. It just makes it much, much harder to leave it.
JD – Another TikTok question.
LW – Fuck sake.
JD – This is from Lain Benson. Oh…
LW – Go on.
JD – They have asked ‘what would you do to me, Jay Darkmoore, in a purge scenario.’
LW – Well that depends how fast you can run.
JD – Moving on quickly… Last one - Terry H TT&B. ‘Where do you see yourself in ten years?’
LW – Alive, if I can help it. Everything else is a bonus.
JD – So we’re nearing the end of this part of the interview. The next part will be for our direct supporters on Patreon, so I have one last question for you, which is, what are we not talking about that we really should be?
LW – The mental health of our emergency workers. And I don’t mean mental health awareness. We’re all aware of it. I mean how shit the mental health of our emergency personnel is, and how the government , for all they say, do not give a fuck. Think about it – if we didn’t have the ambulance, police and the fire service, the fabric that holds society together would rip and tear overnight.
One in three people of the general public in the UK will experience one traumatic event in their lives. A first responder will be exposed to almost four hundred traumatic events in their career. Approximately twenty percent of police officers in the UK exhibit symptoms of PTSD or CPTSD, and a lot of them are unaware of it. Twelve percent of ambulance personnel, and eighteen percent of fire fighters. Just yesterday I had to sign off a detective on sick leave because they had to go through someone’s phone that had committed suicide. The guy hung himself from a tree, and there were messages from his children, six and five, begging him to come home. The detective analysing the phone put on a brave face, but I knew it had shaken him, so I sent him home and put him in touch with occupational health. My superior was only interested in who would take on the cases he had ongoing, which meant I had to put additional strain on the other staff on the team. I am not saying we need to moddy coddle officers. They know the job they signed up for, but the culture of ‘just get on with it,’ is frankly, absurd. Pair that with bosses that wear crowns on their shoulders who are stat hungry to get more Home Office funding, their next promotion regardless of the efficacy or morality of what they’re doing to the officers and the public, all because the government have frankly fucked the system up so badly, meaning public service is impacted, that compounds the distain people have for the police, and the nature of what police officers do, I suspect that statistic is just scraping the barrel. Never had we have more officers leaving the job that was once a career for life. Never have we seen such low morale. Imagine if the police stopped policing. The effects of that would be unthinkable.
JD – Laura, you have given us a lot to think about. If you’re happy, we can have a minute, and then ask you some questions from our supporters?
LW – Can I get a glass of wine?
Patreon only content -
JD – What do you think about prominent celebrities in the world – Andrew Tate, for example…
To read the exclusive answers to the toughest questions, click here.
Why I Love Having Imposter Syndrome.
How Imposter Syndrome made me a best selling author
Image from Google
Imposter syndrome is characterised by feeling inadequate like you are an imposter in the field you are working in. In layman’s terms, you fear that everyone around you will suddenly find out you don’t have a clue what you’re doing. Join the club.
I have had (and still do) Imposter Syndrome since I published my first novel, and every subsequent novel thereafter. I get it whenever I do an interview, get a great message from a fan, or tell someone what I do for a living. Whenever someone highlights an issue with a story, I hastily rush to fix it. If I get a bad review. If I get trolled. At any moment, I fear will be exposed as a charlatan, and be cast outside into the rain and mud.
And yet, I embrace it. Here’s why –
Image from Google
Why do we have this feeling? Well, put simply, it comes down to two things –
1 – We care about what we’re doing.
One of the fundamental reasons that Imposter Syndrome can be so prevalent in our minds is that we are working on something we care about. We spend hours at the desk in solitude, crafting a world, characters, and storyline to share it with the world. It’s our passion that keeps us up late into the night, day after day, working away at our creation. If we didn’t give a shit, then we wouldn’t care if we succeeded or failed, and we would simply stop when it got hard.
2 – We lack confidence in our own abilities.
This is the biggie right here. We lack self-confidence in our abilities. We take every negative comment and every bad review to heart. It breaks the fragility of our confidence, and we find ourselves crying into our half-completed manuscript. But this is real life, guys. There are no safe spaces here. Suck it up and roll with it.
Image from Google
How do we overcome imposter syndrome? This is very simple. Are you ready?
You outwork your self-doubt. Read that again.
You must outwork that feeling of thinking that you aren’t good enough. You must identify the reason why you feel the way you do. Is it because you don’t feel like you know enough about the subject you are in? Well, then learn more. Read books on the subject. Research your industry. Speak to others in the world you have found yourself in. Try new things. New ways of doing what you’re doing. You can never know too much.
If it’s monetary or scalability on your business, then go back to basics. What makes your product unique? Who is your target market? Identify who these people are, and then build connections with them. Start from the bottom again, and work through the fundamentals. You can move up a rung on the ladder when you have a strong foundation.
Image from Google
Don’t stop creating.
Many writers have written tonnes of books that barely moved off the shelves, but they kept going at it. They kept working, building a fan base, and improving their craft.
Comparison is the Thief of Joy.
I love that saying, as cliché as it is, because it’s so true. If you compare yourself to JK Rowling or George R R Martin when you haven’t released your first book, then you will never write a single word. But here’s the secret – at one point, they were just like you - staring at a dog shit first draft and feeling sick at the sight of it. We only see people when they are successful. We don’t see the thousands of hours they invested into their craft with nothing happening.
Image from Google
Use Your Current Successes as Evidence.
Remember when you got that awesome review? Released that new book? Got a message from someone you had never spoken to who told you that they loved your work? Those examples are all evidence that you are doing what you are meant to be doing, and that you are good at it. Use that knowledge, that back catalogue, as fuel to your fire when moving forward and upskilling. Acknowledge what you did in the past, identify any mistakes you have made, and then learn from them. Identify, refine, and replicate.
Imposter syndrome is the vulture on our shoulders. It’s that part of our brains that tells us that we aren’t cut out to be doing what we’re doing, regardless of all the evidence surrounding us that tells us the contrary. We can focus on the one thing that isn’t going right and lose sight of all the things around us that got us to our position in the first place. In other words, you can’t see the forest because you’re focusing on a single tree.
Imposter syndrome isn’t a bad thing. Welcome it into your life. Let that fear of failure, getting it wrong, and not being good enough propel you into work and learning. Only through hard work and dedication to what you’re doing, bit by bit, will you get where you need to be.
Stepping out of your comfort zone will always lead to self-doubt. You’re going against the curve, putting your head above the firing line. But if you work at it, maybe in a year, maybe ten, you will get where you want to be. The best time to plant a tree was yesterday. The second-best time is now.
Creating a business is like trying to paint a mountain one layer of paint at a time. It’s a huge task, but little by little, effort after effort, you will get there.
Jay Darkmoore
Jay Darkmoore is a UK best-selling author with a background in crime and investigation. He is a huge fan of all things dark - exploring the macabre, demonic and darker aspects of the human psyche.
Jay likes putting his characters in terrible situations and then turning out all the lights. To date, he has self-published novels of horror, crime and dark fantasy dystopia. His inspirations are Stephen King, Keith C Blackmore and Nick Cutter.
When not at his desk, Jay spends his free time making YouTube videos to help writers in their craft, promoting other books he has enjoyed, as well as hitting the gym and taking wild cold plunges with ducks.
He is a single parent to his son Joe who is his biggest fan.
Support the author by signing up for his newsletter at jaydarkmooreauthor.com for exclusive content.
10 Tips for New Authors
Image from Google
When I first started publishing in 2019, I didn’t have a clue what I was doing. I had heard about things like ‘marketing,’ ‘newsletters,’ ‘book launches,’ and ‘pen names’ etc, but naively, I thought it would be as simple as writing a book, clicking publish, and posting on social media about it, then sit back and watch royalise roll in.
And they did! For about five minutes, and then my book was buried under the weight of the virtual amazon bookshelf.
So, four years on, I have done a lot of learning. My newsletter is well into triple figures, my books are selling regularly, and my following has grown immensely.
Below are a few things that I have learned the hard way, so that you can get to where you want to be quicker.
1 – Pick a genre, or at least, use a pen name.
Does Stephen King write romance? Does JK Rowling write splatterpunk? You know exactly what you’re getting when you hear these names, and you want your readers to know the same when they hear yours.
I write very dark fiction, from crime thrillers, horror and dark fantasy. My readers will cross over into the other genres, because they enjoy the style of my writing, and the themes correlate to each other. Now imagine if I threw in a romantic comedy in there, or a children’s colouring book. My readers would be very confused, and so would the Amazon algorithm.
You must stick to a genre, and if you wish to deviate from that genre, use a pen name. It prevents your readers from getting confused, and also the meta data and voodoo witchcraft of Amazon from getting confused too. It will encourage read through, and you will attract those kinds of readers that enjoy the work you put out. Amazon will also push your books in front of the eyes of potential readers who enjoy the genre you’re writing in.
Remember, if everyone is your target audience, then no one is.
Image from Google
2 – Consume the genre you write in.
If you write horror, crime or romance, you should read it or at least consume it through other mediums. It will give you an idea of chapter lengths, feel, tone and language used in these kinds of books. It will allow you to write and create something that is familiar to the readers of that market, and not accidently throw in a unicorn in the middle of a steampunk dystopia.
3 – Writer’s block doesn’t exist.
I have spoken about this in a few of my blogs and videos. You do not need inspiration to write. You do not need the muse to appear to you. If you write only when you’re inspired, you will fail. You must make writing a part of your day and treat it like a job. You must give yourself targets, word counts and deadlines. You must write when you don’t want to. That is how books get written.
Image from Google
4 – Writing is a business.
If you want to make a living writing and telling stories, then you must adopt a business mindset. This is why writing in a genre is so important, and why writing to a schedule is so paramount.
No, I don’t mean sleezy sales tactics or underhanded techniques. Marketing is basically putting your book in front of people that will want to read it. It’s that simple.
Learn about marketing. Learn about calls to action, mailing lists and how to engage with your readers and build relationships with them. Don’t be one of these annoying writers who scream in a crowded room for someone to buy their book.
Find a target market. Find where those people hang out. Engage first, then promote. Offer something for free. Encourage sign ups to your mailing list. Offer content, and then promote your work.
How to market as a writer
5 – Self-publishing is a viable option.
If you dream of being a traditionally published author, then that’s brilliant. All power to you, but don’t think that if you manage to land a publishing deal, you’re set for life. Far from it. I know plenty of writers that are still not making ends meet through trad publishing deals, and many independent self-published writers that are making bank each year through DIY publishing.
Decided what you want to do and focus on it. A proverb I love is ‘A man who chases two hares will catch neither,’ and you need to focus your energy on one path and get very good at it.
Focus is the key.
Image from Google
6 – You don’t have to be the best at everything.
You don’t have to be the best writer. The best marketer. The best at SEO, emails, social media etc. You just have to be good enough at a lot of it.
7 – Never stop learning.
The landscape of publishing and writing is always changing. Don’t think you will know everything. You will fall down rabbit holes and implement information, and then you will discover something new to try.
8 – You will need to write books. And then more books. And then more.
You will not get successful from one book wonder. Lightning strikes do happen (E.L James – 50 Shades of Grey), but do not build your career on the hope of a one book wonder success. If you’re in this for the long term, then you better be ready to write millions of words and keep publishing.
9 – People will laugh at you for being a writer.
Fuck them.
10 – You will get discouraged.
Everyone does. We all have slow days. We all hit mental blocks. We all have self-doubt. Be consistent, and outwork your self-doubt by writing good stories, and putting them in front of people that want to read them.
Jay Darkmoore is a writer and writing coach from the UK and author of over ten titles and counting.
How to Write a Psychopath
How to write a psychopath in your book, and why you should.
American Psycho
Psychopaths are incredibly fun to read in books and watch on the big screen and have been popularised by some very infamous and somewhat controversial films and books, from American Psycho written by Bret Easton Ellis, Hannibal Lecter by Thomas Harris and even James Bond by Ian Fleming.
But why is it that these characters have captured both love and fear in our hearts? What is it about them that makes us want to know more? Is it their propensity to violence? Their ability to be cunning and manipulative without feeling any remorse? Is it their self-confidence and being able to think under pressure? Whatever the reason, our hearts have a soft place in them for psychopaths in literature.
In this blog, I am going to tell you how to create your very own in your fiction, and it will maybe help you spot these same traits in other characters you enjoy.
Hannibal Lecter
Traits of a psychopath –
Most Psychopaths are male, with them making up approx. 1% of the population, and are estimated to make up 50 – 80% of the prison population. Women that show high traits of Psychopathy are more likely to be diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder, which along with Psychopathy, is a ‘Cluster B’ personality disorder along with Narcissism and Histrionic Personality Disorder as outlined in the Diagnostical and Statistical Manual Version 5 (DSM – 5 for short) of the American Psychiatric Association.
Psychopathy lends itself to having many different traits, all of which are useful in certain situations, and can even benefit those in certain careers (below). Most people can dial these traits down as and when they need them, but a psychopath can’t and would always have these traits on the high setting in their brains.
These are low empathy, impulsivity, calm under pressure, manipulative, charming, ruthlessness and emotionally detached and show a lack of remorse for their actions.
James Bond
This list can make for some fantastic characters and even make for some fantastic story arcs. Maybe a character is charming and loving, and then later down the line, we see that it was all manipulation to convince someone to give up their life savings, and then abandon them. Tinder Swindler, anyone?
Or maybe we have a character that is a military soldier, a warrior, who is ruthless and can cut through the enemy without a shred of remorse? A police officer who will do anything to crack the case, or a surgeon who has the steadiest hand to make that vital, life-saving cut with everything on the line?
Psychopaths make for excellent characters. They make incredibly fun heroes to write about, and add a lot more depth to the ‘bad guy.’ We can look into their childhood, in that a psychopathic person would have normally come from some kind of abusive childhood, and uses psychopathy as a way to navigate the world based off of that. It gives the character more back story. More depth.
Professor Kevin Dutton
According to psychologist Professor Kevin Dutton, most psychopaths are split into two categories. Those with high traits and a low propensity to commit violence, and those with high psychopathic traits and a higher propensity to violence.
Those that are of lower violent tendencies are more likely to be characterised by high-pressure positions, such as politicians, CEOs, police officers, lawyers and high-end athletes. These could make for some great characters and some side characters, and maybe even a villain or two in there? Maybe the villain is a top businessman of a rival company that is trying to sabotage the hero’s chances at getting their foot on the corporate ladder? Or even a detective that drinks too much and is emotionally vacant when around other people, but is ruthless and driven to catch the bad guy?
Jack Torrance - The Shining
The psychopaths that are high in psychopathic traits with a higher level of predisposition to violence would be our classical villains such as serial killers, a criminal mob boss and even a soldier that has gone rogue.
Psychopaths make for great foreshadowing opportunities too, as they can be very manipulative. In your story, you can have the psychopath dropping hints and leaving clues for the rest of the characters to find, and then when the big reveal comes later in the book, the reader can connect the dots and have the ‘Oh my god!’ moment that we all love to create when they figure it all out.
Lorna - By Jay Darkmoore
In my dark romance ‘Lorna,’ the main character in the story ‘Christian’ is a psychopath, and he will stop at nothing to not only win the heart of Lorna, his new infatuation but also kill and destroy the lives of anyone that dares stand in his way.
Order it here on kindle unlimited today.
Psychopaths are so much fun to write and can offer a lot of depth to your characters and the story. Even just highlighting certain traits outlined above and giving them to your characters can make a lot of difference to your writing.
Have fun with it and thank you for reading.
But what about other writing ideas? What about being able to break through writer’s block?
What it’s really like being an independently published author
What it’s really like being an Indie Author
You have been lied to.
Forget the ‘Make $1000 a day’ or ‘How to get RICH quick with KDP’ videos on YouTube. I am telling you now. They are complete bullshit.
Think about it; why would anybody do anything other than sell books on KDP if it was that easy to make money? And not only that, if you discovered a secret money pile, would you really tell everyone about it? It’s clickbait. And I feel that you, like me, have been on that hook many times.
I have been selling books independently using Amazon KDP for around two years now. Let me save you a lot of pain in the long run and allow me to break your heart quickly.
It is not easy. It is not a get-rich-quick scheme. I have been a delivery driver, a carer for disabled children, and even a police officer. And running a business as an independent author is by far the hardest job I have ever had to do.
And yet, I and thousands of others still do it. Not because I want to get rich quickly (even though I wouldn’t mind having a few more zeros in my bank account generated from book sales), but because I must write stories. I must get them out of my head. I must see what the characters get up to and I am their guide, as they too guide me through the narrative.
So that said, is KDP a fool’s game? Far from it. Is it possible to make a living, even a great living from selling books online? Absolutely. But is it easy? Not a cat in hell’s chance.
The Three Questions
Firstly, if you want to sell books on KDP, you have to ask yourself are you prepared to invest money into book covers and editors.
Are you willing to spend money on adverts, keywords and marketing?
Are you willing to spend hours and hours not only writing a book, but editing it, sending it out to beta readers, Advanced Copy Readers, build a network of other writers and readers in the hope that with enough time, effort and tears you will eventually be able to make a living out of doing this?
If you answered No to a single one of those questions, then give up now and don’t bother. But if you answered Yes to all of them, then you are about to embark on an amazing journey.
Like the heroes in the stories we write, being an independent author is filled with a roller coaster of emotions. I remember the first time I was able to buy a meal with the royalties I got from my debut novel The Space Between Heaven and Hell. I remember my first bad review on The Everlife Chronicles. I remember the amazing interviews I have had with writers on my Instagram, and the first YouTube video I uploaded that got comments.
Self-publishing is an incredible thing to make a living from if you have a realistic mindset about it all. It won’t be overnight, and if you can’t defer gratification then this is not the career for you.
When I first started self-publishing, I devoured everything I could about the subject. Some things stuck, and others didn’t. I made mistakes. I wasted money. I bought courses that promised a quick fix. I bought budget book covers that still give me nightmares. I skipped out on the editing. I overpaid for ads. All to chase the dream.
But there is something that comes from fucking up. You get experience. You lick your wounds, and you get back up and get back in front of the keyboard and you crunch away. You will always make mistakes. You will always have more to learn, and you will pick yourself up more times than you can count and get back to it.
So for the budding author reading this. I thank you. Not only for reading my blog, but for chasing your dream in the pursuit of writing stories.
If you are looking to embark on this journey, then I implore you to read on to my next blog, ‘How to Market as an Indie Author.’
Interview with FELIX BLACKWELL, author of Stolen Tongues
Interview with the author of Stolen Tongues, Felix Blackwell
Stolen Tongues
In 2022, I stumbled upon the book Stolen Tongues by the independent author Felix Blackwell.
With a love of horror, and a flare for the craft myself, I downloaded the book and set dove head first into this tortured tale. I finished the book within a few short days, unable to put it down and unable to sleep as a result.
The book is phenomenal: drawing on the fear of the unknown, the dark and that someone (something) may be feeding off the unconscious mind of a loved one and you can do nothing but watch them dissolve into insanity. It reminded me of two tales I am fond of -
The Babadook - A movie in which an entity is personified as grief and slowly eats away at the protagonist that is gripped in an unconscious battle with unresolved trauma, like a rotten tooth that is left to fester.
It Follows - A brilliant tale of something unknown is following you. Its origin and motivations are unknown, other than it is unseen other than those afflicted by its curse, and it will stop at nothing until it has devoured you.
The book draws you in from the beginning, and the vice grip of terror doesn’t relent until the final page. Felix creates a terrifying tale laced with love, loathing, mystery and desperation. Not to mention the psychological and mental illness themes that run through the narrative, all to concoct a wicked tale of hellish brilliance.
As I enjoyed this book so much, I decided to reach out to the master of horror himself, and he kindly allowed me to pick his hellish mind.
Felix Blackwell - Facebook
The Interview
Firstly Felix, I would like to begin by saying I am thrilled that you have agreed to do this. I really enjoyed your work, and I reached out on a whim. It shows how much you care for those that take the time to read your work in that you are happy to speak to them and answer a few questions they might have.
JD – So, when did you begin writing?
F.B – I started writing poetry and flash fiction around age seven. My mom has been a writer her entire life, so I used to watch her do it as a kid, and I began imitating her as I got older. A pivotal moment in my early writing life was a two-page fantasy story I was assigned to write in fifth grade; I had so much fun with it that I turned in something like 25 pages. It did not go over well with the teacher.
JD – When did you start taking things seriously?
F.B – An unpublished video game I wrote between 2006-09 was the first thing I put professional-grade effort into. I built the world, developed the characters and history, wrote all the quests, etc. It was the first major project I had ever brought to completion. My intention was to sell the intellectual property to a video game company because I had friends in the industry. In the end, nobody wanted it, and I realized I was just a starry-eyed nobody who wanted to live the dream of writing game lore. Since then, I’ve converted the game into a universe in which I’m writing two fantasy novels. I have yet to publish one of those, but I plan to within the next few years, after a few more urgent horror novels.
JD – Where did the idea of Stolen Tongues come from?
F.B – Stolen Tongues came from my partner’s sleep disorder, and a very talkative parrot I used to know. I thought up the idea of a creepy entity trying to interrogate her as she talked in her sleep, and later I decided it should imitate humans through observation and interaction, much like the parrot. I grew up in Colorado, so that felt like a natural setting for the story.
JD – How did you feel having both yourself and your partner as the characters of the story? Is there any truth to the character’s personalities compared to yourselves in real life?
F.B – The characters are mostly based on our real personalities, with a few details changed. She is tough, fiery, and loves taking naps; I am much more of a reader than a fighter, so I’d be as ineffective as Felix in a confrontation with an interdimensional parrot-monster.
JD – Stolen Tongues has had a lot of success. Tell me how that happened?
F.B – It was dumb luck. I posted a story to NoSleep and it went to the front page of Reddit within a few hours. From there, I converted it into a full novel, and people have been sharing it all over social media ever since. I did zero marketing and frankly did not expect the story to get virtually any attention. It was written stream-of-consciousness style and did not have the proper planning of my other works. I’m still shocked it’s more popular than In the Devil’s Dreams, which I consider to be a superior example of my writing style.
JD – The story reminded me of The Babadook, in which you deal with trauma and grief in a manifestation which follows a person around and breaks them down. Was that intentional? What was the inspiration for that?
F.B – I personally don’t think of the Impostor as a metaphorical manifestation of negative emotions (but if you like those types of monsters, In the Devil’s Dreams is chock-full of them). But I do see the similarities. The Impostor, to me, is a very real entity whose origins are unknown, and who is especially drawn to people with hidden trauma – for reasons that will be explored to a deeper level in the upcoming prequel novel. The inspiration for the metaphorical creatures I do write, however, probably comes from my boundless love of the Silent Hill franchise.
JD – Have you had any formal training of writing?
F.B – I sometimes argue that the great lesson of college and graduate school, for me, was not the body of knowledge associated with the degrees I earned, but rather the study of writing itself. I didn’t teach for many years before switching careers, but I certainly gained most of what I know about writing – fiction and academic – from my years at study. And I still use that training every day.
JD – You have released further books. Tell me about those?
F.B – In the Devil’s Dreams is a densely metaphorical, unreliably narrated psychological thriller told out of chronological order. It will be an ordeal for some readers, but for me, it was an act of self-help after exiting an unhealthy relationship. It is about pain, loss, and the wounds we all conceal from each other. The Cold People is an anthology comprised of short horror stories written by me and my close friend, Colin J. Northwood. It contains early sketches of the ideas that later became Stolen Tongues.
JD – Plotter, panzer, or something in between?
F.B – I’m the most devout plotter I know. I worldbuild and plot so much that by the time I start writing the manuscript, 90% of the work is already done. Structure and scaffolding hold up a good story, and I think it’s the most important skill a writer can develop. I’m still working on it…
JD – Whose writing are you influenced by?
F.B – Mary Shelley and Dan Simmons were my favorite horror authors when I was younger, and a few years ago I finally sat down and actually read much of Lovecraft’s bibliography. I would say his work, and the other titans of weird fiction after him, have had a greater influence on my recent writing than anyone else I’ve ever read. Lovecraft truly disturbs me to my core.
JD – What got you into writing?
F.B – I always had a lot of big feelings when I was younger. I realized in my teens that the only way I could accurately express them was through an instrument, or through a pen. So I do both now. I wanted to make other people feel the way my favorite music and books made me feel.
JD – Stolen Tongues has opted for a film. Can you share anything about that?
F.B – It’s been optioned several times and passed around Hollywood a bit. A few scripts have been written for it. So far, the next major step, which is securing a partnership between the screenplay writers and the production company, has not yet come to pass. I wish I could say more but I’ve signed a lot of contracts. When there is real news to share, I’ll be screaming it from the top of Pale Peak.
JD – Do you write in other genres or just horror?
F.B – I’ve got a fantasy and a psychological thriller in development, but they’re sort of on hold while I work on the Stolen Tongues prequel.
JD – Any marketing tips? How do you promote yourself?
F.B – I have never really marketed myself. I just got lucky and had people review my work a lot on social media. I do sometimes interact with readers in the online book clubs, but I have never paid a service to increase my SEO or stick my book on the front page of an ebook newsletter or anything like that. I feel a lot of those services are scammy and should probably be avoided. Success is fickle in this industry, and I have to say, I read more talented and more creative writers than me every single day… fate could have chosen any one of them instead. It’s all so random.
JD – What challenges did you face when writing Stolen Tongues?
F.B – Stolen Tongues was originally a one-off short story that I submitted to NoSleep, just to see if maybe ten people liked my writing style enough to upvote it. When I saw that it had gone viral, I hurriedly wrote a second entry, and then a third… I think I ended up at like nineteen entries, and all of these were written without much of a plan. I remember standing at a bus stop at the base of campus, wondering alongside all the other readers just how the hell I was going to end the story – on the night before the final entry was set to come out. NEVER AGAIN.
JD – You dip into Native American lore and culture in the book. How did you find doing this?
F.B – I was in graduate school working on my Master’s thesis in American History at the time I started writing Stolen Tongues. I was doing a few major projects on Indigenous histories, and was particularly moved by an ethnography I’d read about the Western Apache. Then I read a book about the Comanche empire, and then I got into Ned Blackhawk’s Violence over the Land. All of that material, and the seminars it was assigned in, caused a huge shift in consciousness for me. I wanted to include Indigenous characters and their personal histories and complicated encounters with Western conceptions of them into my writing. I think ultimately I just wanted to start a conversation about Indigenous people in the horror genre.
JD – What does your writing process look like?
F.B – I write a book in three stages: the first is catching all of the associated characters, plots, settings, and ideas into a physical journal. That’s my favorite part, and I do that for several months. Then I start organizing and refining all of that raw material into a more honed project. That’s the hardest part. And when that’s done, the easiest part is just taking that project apart, piece by piece, and converting each piece into a chapter. None of this happened with Stolen Tongues by the way. I completely winged that shit due to time constraints, and it shows. I only had seven months to convert that story series into a novel because of a poorly selected Kickstarter due date.
JD – You rose to infamy with the story on Reddit. Tell me how that happened? Describe to me the process and any issues/highs/lows you felt?
F.B – I talked a bit about this earlier, but the whole thing felt totally surreal. Never before had anyone appreciated my writing, and suddenly I had tens of thousands of people reading my story all over the world. Every single email and personal message I got blew my mind. The thing that I still can’t believe, even to this day, is stumbling upon conversations online where people are debating the symbolism and characters. Totally unreal.
JD – I have a tonne of other questions to ask, but I think this might be the biggest one. What advice would you give to someone that is thinking of starting their own writing career?
F.B – Write because you feel compelled to do so at the level of your soul. If you write with the intention of “making it” financially, you will very likely be disappointed. Let any financial success be an unexpected bonus. Write a few times a week, and make sure all of your content is high-quality – it represents you.
JD – Closing thoughts. Is there anything you would like to say about yourself, or your work? Leave the readers with something to think about?
F.B – Many of your lingering questions about Stolen Tongues will be addressed in the prequel novel. And that novel will be a surprise, for a lot of reasons.
Felix Blackwell was summoned from the bowels of reddit after a botched summoning ritual. He writes in the horror, thriller, and fantasy genres.